Time out for Women: Amazing, Difficult, a true Lesson to me.

9.16.2007


Well on Saturday my mom and I went to Time out for Women; it was GREAT! I loved all of the speakers; they each had such great stories to tell and I was drawn in the whole time. It didnt' feel like being at an emotional Relief Society meeting where everyone is crying for who knows why; you know what I mean. ha. Instead, it was so laid back! Which is amazing to get that many women together and have such a 'friend' feeling. I wish I could write down all the stories for you guys but then this post would be 2 pages long! ha.


As absolutely wonderful this was; it was also one of the hardest times I have ever had. I didn't really think I would talk about this so publicaly but I wanted to share this experience because it was a lesson to me.


Many of you know that Josh and I just had a miscarriage this past month. When we first heard the news it was emotional obviously, but I knew with out a doubt that this was obviously what Heavenly Father had planned for us. I never felt angry about having a miscarriage; I did feel some frustrating with the physical pain I had to go through but I tried to stay as positive as possible. I knew everything would be okay and that we will have a baby some day. However, on Saturday at this 'Time out' there were pregnant women everywhere, and newborns everywhere. And for the first time I felt myself trying to contain myself from crying in front of everyone. I heard the babies crying and I saw it as such a sweet sound; I can't wait to hear our own baby crying and to be able to comfort it.


I thought that would be the end of it, but every single talk was about Motherhood and how being a mother is the most important job there could ever be; something I have had a very strong belief in since I was young. All I have ever wanted was to be a stay at home mother and hearing all about it was making me get even more emotional. I sat there trying to contain myself and yet I could not stop crying; and yet I absolutely was loving the talks and wanted to hear more. They just helped me be even more excited for the moment Josh and I do get to have our little baby one day.


I realized something during all this; I have been so determined to be so strong through out all this; I was determined to prove to myself that I was okay and I would not let the miscarriage get to me. But being there I felt that Heavenly Father was telling me "it's okay to cry and to be sad"; and even though I know that everything is in his time and I am not angry; I still deserve to cry and let it all out. I needed this to kind of hit me in the head and tell me it's okay to let my guard down and be emotional; and just because I want to cry does not mean that I don't trust in the lord. I absolutely trust him more than anything and know that if I didn't this miscarriage would be harder than I could imagine. Without Heavenly Father I wouldn't be able to get through this; and I'm grateful he "hit me in the head" and told me to cry and feel bad for a moment.


As weird as it might sound, having a miscarriage has been an amazing experience and it has only made me that much more excited about being a mom. And not JUST a mom; but a Mother! I hope all you mothers realize how amazing you are and that you are not just a mom; because it is the hardest, most demanding, and most rewarding job any woman can have; and I can't wait to have it!


I am sorry this is so long, this probably means more to me to write all this down then it does to everyone else, but I felt like I needed to let it out. If you can, you should all go to Time out for Women, or Time out for Couples! I can't wait to go again next year! Thank you so much mom for taking me!




Real quick; Kenneth Cope was there and I have never really heard his music but knew my mom loved him and now I am a lover! ha. He was amazing and had such a clean pure voice and his music was touching.


Sheri Dew was there as well; whom my mom absolutely loves; and once again I didn't know much about her, but I went up on stage with her when she asked for all the 22 year olds and younger to come up and my mom took a picture; I just wished I could have taken mom up there so she could meet her. I loved her talk!


Each speaker was great!!






Mom and Me
Sheri Dew with us all on stage; I'm on the left


Kenneth Cope on the big screen

6 comments:

  1. You are brave Meagan. I don't think I would post something so personal. I think you are right, you can feel sad, but it doesn't mean your faith is weak. We love you!

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  2. I have found you to be amazingly strong through the past few weeks, and I think it is because you realize the importance of relying not only on our Heavenly Father, but His Son, Jesus Christ. I can see how He has blessed you. He has blessed me too, with good and faithful children, and I'm very grateful to Him, and each of you for that blessing. You make being a mother such a joy.
    I too, am looking forward to next year's TOFW.

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  3. Meagan,

    Thank you so much for sharing your feelings. Heavenly Father does love us and Jesus Christ has experienced everything you are going through. I know without a doubt that when the time comes for you to be a mother you will be an awsome one and how truly blessed your children will be because of your testimony and your faithfulness in our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.

    Love,

    Sharea

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  4. Amazing!! You are such an amazing example. Thank you for that emotinal post. You are such a strong woman and I love ya!
    Love, Holly

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  5. Megs I love your hair color! Looks great on you!!!

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  6. Oh and your post was excellent! Thanks for sharing, I can't wait to attend Time Out for Women here in Atlanta! Luvs!

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